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BF: Well, how would you describe your, your father then? What kind of words or memories come to mind when you think of, of him? 'Cause you spent a great deal of time by his side growing up.

TM: Well, there's no such thing as typical, but he was a Issei that -- ganko, meaning he's a man and his word was supposed to be good, and he -- so, I don't want to say unreasonable, but they were, they had their own idiosyncrasy of, of demanding certain things, and expecting certain things. And that's, I would say typical of some Japanese men that are raised to be the household, head of the household and expected to carry on and take certain responsibility. He had some of that. And my cousins, male uncles or cousins, they, when they come home they just sit there at the dinner table, and they get served by either the wife, or the mother-in-law, or the mother, or daughters. And he was somewhat like that. Although I heard, and I never saw, but when my mother had the children he used to do the laundry and things like that, which was probably, he never wanted to make public. [Laughs] But, but also I remember he talked -- he wasn't educated other than the ninth grade mandatory education, which is still the situation in Japan. But he used to think, and he used to have his drinks with the, some of the Buddhist ministers. And so he would get into some philosophical issues because I used to go with him once in a while to like the church. Maybe he would deliver something and stick around for a drink or two. I would just sit there and wonder. But I remember him talking about some of those issues, I don't know, philosophical, maybe not religious, but issues that you would expect ministers or Bonsans or reverends would talk about it. And so he was, not intellect, but he, he had some ideas and he enjoyed talking about those things, which I, I don't want to say I emulate, but you kinda tend to appreciate that kind of intelligence of somebody, anybody, especially if it's your father I guess.

BF: What sort of things do you remember him expressing? Values or --

TM: Well, getting back, he would say things that were probably related to Taoism more than Buddhism, but like respect your parents. And I remember things like, well maybe he doesn't say it exactly, but you come into the world kinda naked and you're gonna leave naked, so you might as well try to do something good, and things like that. He would say those things and, and I'm not saying he was lecturing, but those are things he used to say. And then philosophically, he'd say, "You gotta treat your customer well so they'll come back." Nothing profound, nothing he's trying to teach you, but those are just thoughts that came to his mind and he would say those things I think.

BF: Tomo was also saying that she remembers, she has memories of him piling all the kids into the van or truck and just driving around to expose them to something other than Japantown, you know Nihonmachi.

TM: I think, I think there was a couple of issues there. He said the world is a big place. You have to travel. And traveling is broadening. So that was one philosophy, and so he traveled as much as he can. And this thing about taking the kids, our kids and the neighbors' kids, or relatives, his relatives' kids out was, he felt it very important that the family stuck together. So he would, when he goes back to Japan he made it a point to visit at least my mother's oldest brother anyway. So he, he told me, and he said that, that it was very important for him to stay in contact with relatives. So he did do that. And then he also, conversely, my mother, when he went, she went back to Japan the few times, went out of her way to go visit my father's sisters, which was a long ways away. Even today it's a six, seven-hour train ride. Can you imagine twenty-five, thirty years ago?

BF: Wow.

TM: It was maybe an all-day trip. So, and I remember him talking, I don't know exact words, but something like blood is thicker than water, or something like that. That kind of feeling he had, and he instilled that on us.

BF: That seems sort of atypical, unusual for his generation because it seems like a lot of, a lot of the Issei lost contact with the family in Japan once they arrived here. And then the war really disrupted things. But it sounds like they kept those contacts, even probably, well we should mention that your, your sister was in Japan, so that probably influenced some of that.

TM: Yeah, probably, but I, I don't know. Thinking about it, young girls, or even young men being sent to Japan for education and culture was not unusual. But...

BF: That's true.

TM: I'm sure that my father felt very comfortable sending my sister to live with her two sisters. But getting back, I don't know how unusual, but he is, was the oldest, and he had good reasons to go back, property and oldest son. I don't know if that's true with other Isseis. Most Isseis would have been the second or third son and they had no chance of taking over the family no matter what it was, so they came over here. But also most -- I wouldn't say most -- but many of the Isseis that I've talked to, or read about, or heard about came because their economic future in Japan was so bleak. So they kind of threw away to come. In other words they came with the thought that they, this was gonna be a new life and everything. Probably much like the Chinese. They came with their flesh and said they'll send back money, where a few, like my father came and said they'll take back money. Maybe that's the difference. But some of the older, his friends that used to come around to the house, I'm guessing now that I think about it, most of 'em didn't have family or were, were kind of the lower ranking within the family hierarchy. So, so probably, looking back, having a place like where my mother and father was, was probably something important to them because they had nothing else, I guess.

<End Segment 4> - Copyright © 1999 Densho. All Rights Reserved.